"Three Noones And A Gauntlett"

Brian "Where's My Camera" Noone:

The youngest member of the ruthless Irish gang known as "Noone Platoon," Brian is considered the least dangerous member of the Platoon. He is wanted for disturbing the peace on Cape Cod in 1993 for getting into a violent argument with a steel guardrail.

Jim "One-Timer" Noone:

Jim Noone was brought to the east coast from Chicago to fill in for a fellow Platoon member, Patrick "Dr. Whiplash" Noone. This was Jim's only appearance at the GPI - he is now missing and presumed married.

Tom "Shattered Glass" Noone:

The reputed ringleader of the Noone Platoon, Tom is wanted for allegedly destroying a car windshield in Newton, Massachusetts. Tom is also wanted at several regional golf courses and driving ranges for being a constant danger to pedestrians and traffic.

Rick "Golf Sucks" Gauntlett:

Rick Gauntlett is not a member of the Noone Platoon "Family" but considered an honorary member for putting up (with) Tom "Shattered Glass" Noone for several years in the Big W. Rick is only a danger to society for two days a year because he only touches his golf clubs two days a year. Rick has been suspected in the past of rain dancing and self inflicted wounds to avoid his annual committment at the Green Plaid Invitational, and his motto "I'm aiming for the clubhouse, I don't care where the damn hole is," has brought him into conflict with trees, unsuspecting civilians, and irate golf course rangers throughout the New England Area.